Apr 14… I am struggling with the proposal scene. I have rewritten it from so many points of view; from his, from hers, from narrator. It never feels right. As I rewrite and rewrite, I think to myself that I should make lunch, I should pick up my taxes, the cat needs grooming, but I sigh. These are all stall tactics to avoid the battleground with this chapter’s difficult scenes… I’m not even hungry, why would I need to make lunch…. I’m stalling…. This is why writing is hard… or at least this is why you should actually be a writer before undertaking writing a novel….What was I thinking?… and this is why I hit moments of saying…. Forget it… I’m not writing one…. who cares anyways……